Let’s start with a question: How long does it take for a society to value a life? In July 2019, Bangladeshi police finally pressed charges against eight members of Ansar al-Islam—a banned militant group—for the brutal 2016 murders of Xulhaz Mannan and Mahbub Rabbi Tonoy, two LGBTI human rights activists who dared to live openly in a world that would rather erase them. Three years. Three years of waiting, of silence, of lives interrupted and justice denied. As a bisexual woman surviving behind a fake name, I ask: will it ever be safe for us to be unafraid?
Religious Conservatism: The Fabric of Fear
Bangladesh is steeped in religious conservatism, where tradition and faith are often wielded as weapons against those who dare to be different. For LGBTQ individuals, especially bisexual women, this means living in the shadows—constantly negotiating between authenticity and survival. The fear isn’t just external; it’s internalized, a voice whispering, “You don’t belong.” But here’s the thing: belonging is overrated when it means erasing your truth.
Islamic Hypocrisy and Challenging Social Norms
Let’s talk about Islamic hypocrisy. It’s the kind that preaches morality while turning a blind eye to violence against LGBTQ people. It’s the selective outrage, the silence of religious leaders, the complicity in discrimination. Challenging these social norms isn’t just rebellious—it’s necessary for survival. Every time we speak up, every time we refuse to hide, we chip away at the walls of fear and shame.
Surviving, Resisting, and Laughing in the Face of Fear
I’ve learned to survive behind a fake name, but I refuse to let fear define me. There are moments of raw vulnerability—nights spent crying, days spent pretending, the constant weight of knowing that visibility could cost me everything. But there are also stories of resilience. We find humour in the absurdity of it all, sarcasm in the face of oppression. We laugh because if we don’t, we’ll cry. And sometimes, we do both.
Call to Embrace Self-Love: Your Existence is a Revolution
To my fellow bisexual women and LGBTQ individuals from conservative backgrounds: your existence is a radical act. Embracing your truth isn’t just about self-love—it’s a revolution. It’s saying, “I am here, I am valid, and I refuse to be erased.” Self-love isn’t selfish; it’s survival. It’s the armor we wear when the world tries to break us.
Justice Delayed, Justice Denied
The delay in justice for Xulhaz and Tonoy is a stark reminder that our lives are still undervalued. The slow wheels of the justice system test our patience and faith. But let’s be clear: justice delayed is justice denied. It’s a message that our lives don’t matter, that our pain is invisible. But we refuse to accept that. We demand recognition, respect, and the right to live openly and safely.
Will It Be Okay for Us to Be Unafraid?
Religious conservatism and Islamic hypocrisy may try to cage us, but our voices are louder, our spirits stronger. Challenging social norms isn’t just necessary—it’s inevitable. So, will it be okay for us to be unafraid? Absolutely. Because our truth is our power. And nothing—no law, no tradition, no extremist mindset—can silence that.
To everyone reading: be bold, be unapologetic, and never let fear dictate your worth. Your existence is enough. Your truth is enough. And together, we will change the world—one defiant act at a time.
